This is my prayer in the desert

Please lay down your arrows
For they're sure to pierce the skin
And water from a broken well
Will make you thirst again
When all things you've acquired
Are tested by the flames
And you can see them melting
Then will you call his name

It's worth it brothers
It's worth it friends
To know your maker
To lose your sin
Did you know that you are dearly loved

To the slaughters you are being led
Being told that it's a party
That this God is in your head
And every single lie
Sounds just like the greatest truth
But the one truth you're not hearing
Is that he died for you

No greater joy
No greater peace
No greater love than this

It's worth it brothers
It's worth it friends
To know your maker
To lose your sin
Did you know that you are dearly loved

It's amazing to me how there's so many things you don't understand (although we think we do) until we are so close to them. And then your heart breaks because you finally understand that there's nothing you can do about it. And I've never claimed to be a strong prayer warrior, so I begin to feel especially helpless. This is partly why I'm so thankful for the family that I have. Because I have been so close to so much pain and I have a better understanding of such heartache and sickness and many people. And this is why I am excited about my sister's book. Her strength and passion inspires me. With a family like mine....us Horvath kids never stood a chance, and I'm afraid some of us got more than others. But with God's grace we've survived (and thrived) thus far and I have a feeling we have great things in our future. Praise Jesus we don't try to do it ourselves though. Been there done that and it got us no where. I'm just thankful for older siblings who taught me what Jesus looks like.