I'm so frustrated right now. I feel stuck. And it feels like I know what the solution is but its out of my reach. Sigh. Our church is going through their annual C3 conference to promote small groups and community. The speaker Wednesday was talking about how small groups are not an option, they are necessary. And it's so true. I haven't been in a small group all summer (just cause our youth stops just about everything like that in the summer) and I miss it. I need accountability. And especially with school I feel like all my Christian partners have kinda left me out to dry. I know a lot of it is my fault too for not making an effort, but its hard. I try...I really do. And "what's her name" is always so concerned about pouring into and lifting up all these other girls, I feel abandoned. I know she's just doing what God's leading her to do but it's hard. I feel like she's not trying cause she thinks I've got all these other people...and I don't. I just feel spiritually drained. And it's not cause I'm away from God or anything....I'm just away from quality time with his people.
That's why I'm so stoked for small groups to start this week. I'm not sure anyone has any idea.
On the bright side...school is amazing. I really think God is saying that this year is the reason why He's had me at Tyner for so long....for THIS year. I've already been given SO many amazing leadership opportunities and relationships (with staff and students). It's such a blessing and terribly frightening all at the same time. But I'm excited. I had a feeling all summer that God was planning something BIG for this year. :) And now I definitely know that he is....we'll just have to wait and see what it is exactly. I'll let you know when he tells/shows me haha.
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